Friday, April 04, 2008

The How to Kill Series : The First


Editor's Note: The blog from now on will be totally committed to describing ways to kill people and things. The owner of the blog is not directly responsible for his actions, he is an escapist and will relinquish any such allegations by a mere shrug.

The first section of this unending series is dedicated to the question : How to kill an optimist?

Before we travel deep into the fathomless sea of ways of killing an optimist, the question that should ring in your head, : Is it possible to kill an optimist?

The answer of course is NO. No you cannot kill an optimist. Some of you may say that I have lost my mind, and in due course present lethal ways of killing an optimist. Some of you who belong to the jovial category may try to gag and would suggest something like shooing a bunch of pessimists on our central theme. Ya sure, probably your jokes will have a better effect.

Tell an optimist that you can kill him. And he will give you a smile similar to a mothers who has just heard her baby’s first word. He will simply discard such a claim. He will simply tell you that he believes that he can survive. That he will still be alive. He would say that you can kill the body but not his never say die spirit. His body may not support his unquenchable spirit of optimism, but the fact is that at the end of the day the optimist still lives..

So what should we do now? Run out of business in our very first edition? Come on, don’t let the pessimist in you rise on such an optimistically correct situation. Throw all your worries on me, that’s why I am here for. I promised you a dead optimist and a dead one you shall get.

The trick is, tell the optimist that it is impossible to kill him. And he will simply chuckle and explain you in full theory how you seem to have confused impossible with difficult. He will tell you ways of killing him and will confess that he is dead too. So here you have it. The optimism is dead.

Next edition:: How to kill a How to kill something series.