Get Real.... NOT

Realism sucks. It sucks big time. I mean realism isnt even real. Its like more unrealistic and illusional than anything. Realism is also very very pessimistic. No?? Well it is more pessimistic than dream world. Dreams are more optimistic. Its realism that shatters them. All the while.. Totally.. So this way realism is actually the villian. Who just cant see dreams flourish... Jealous bitch....



If only I could have had a dime everytime someone told me to be realistic. No I couldnt have a dime... That would be very "UNrealistic"... They go on like... Be realistic man... Why would anyone wanna give you a dime... Gee man...Get a life... (Why do I sound like Ozzy in my head??? Actually NOT... I said two sentences without using the F* word...)...See it sucks out the life outta every God damn thing... Right GOD..... Now thats realistic.... Suckers.... Everything that glitters isn't gold... Yea like Fuck...Ozzy in the making???? Gee Shucks....

I am not gonna go on, as to what you would expect, into preaching as to how anything that has not been tried doesnt mean it is not possible kinda shit. Because that would be something that you would be expecting me to do. I am pretty unpredictable, get used to the idea... That was so lame btw.... Man it was totally weak.... Anywho...



Its realism that broke up the Beatles.... Hippie Shit.... And Sabbath.... Thats its nature, to destroy... Get unreal man... Get unreal....



And yea Ozzy Osbourne will be knighted... No matter what they or CHOMU says.... OZZY \m/... To be... Sir Ozzy Osbourne.... My Votes for Ozzy... Ozzy for President....Yeah... Dont fucking real me..... OZZY RULZ!!!!!!

CHOMU's Birthday....btw....... YAY...........

GREAT.... Britain

I always thought he (OZZY DUH!!! Btw the mouse in the pic is totally pissed off..), was the last best thing I will hear from the British Isles for a very very VERY long time. I mean rarely can anything beat his biting the head of a live bat, at a live show, in front of live audience... I mean what the fuck??? In front of a LIVE audience... Dude, you are still cool without showing off...Hmmmph.... Here in the pic he does a redo with a poor helpless puppet (I tried and tried for a whole two minutes but couldn't find his biting the head of a bat pic)... Sigh all puppets are helpless at the hands of OZZY... OZZY rocks totally btw..\m/... Beg as you may and as much, to differ, or otherwise but I simply say HuH?? Btw his bitin the head off Kenny totally kicked ass as well..... Although I am not too sure as to why he (Ozzy DUH!!!) keeps biting everyones/everythings head off.... Anywho....



But leaving aside all that I finally found something or rather someone to top OZZY.. Yup meet Nils Olav.. The Brits have done it... They have knighted a penguin... A PENGUIN.. WTF??? So Nils Olav... Oooops sorry for my ignorance... SIR Nils Olav... here in the pics inspects the guard of honour..See how in the second pic he closely and minutely inspects the guards..... Beat that.... Hippies....






Nah... That was totally weak... No matter what... OZZY RULZ... No fucking, guard of honor inspecting, moving his ass like a penguin Sir Nils Fucking Olav can be any where close.... No way...

Black & White

Sleepless nights is an under-estimated thing. Its been a while now.. But it is always them, or rather her... Never hurting me, but always there.. Once in a bath tub, once on a dark, many - a - times walked upon, street, another time eating a friend (Atleast thats what I think he was, cause I wouldn't go out on walks with non- friends, especially if they are guys).. Once took my brother on a ride (I told you CHOMU... Drop the fucking rope.... Nooooooooooooo....)... But always there... Thats my thing I guess.. I always get snakes in my dreams... Always...

Its not that I dream all that often but whenever be the case they are always there... Hisssssing there way, I dont know why???... My Ma thinks that it is because I suffer from atheism, that the GODS have become angry.... HOLY SMOKE...



***************************Thunder***************************

Hope she never reads this... Come on Ma I dont wanna wake up early... Not on weekends... I promise I will never have snakes in my dreams ever again.....

A friend(this is not my claim...the friend thingy...) thinks that its because I was probably a snake charmer in my previous birth.... My thoughts exactly.....

My humble thoughts, makes me think(Ahem??) that there is a certain Miss Fangs who wants her presence to be felt...SNAKE CHARMER....YEAH BABY... So she haunts me and crawls in my dreams... I wonder if she dreams of me too?? In some hole in the ground... Dreaming... Oblivious to the fact that it is raining outside and her hole would be full of water.... WET DREAM....



I tried many a things.... Not that they, the snakes hurt me.... But still what the fuck its my life and my dreams.... So I do because I am.... HuH??


But nothings worked, so far.... I even read Sigmund Freud to change my dreams... But all he could interpret is that it is the rise of my sexual life.... HuH?? What am I?? 13?? What the fuck?? Screw yourself Siggie.. Wow my dreams come 10 years too late... But probably there is no linear time in dream world... For you may think that you dreamt something but are never too sure... Soooooooooo..... Technically... Only technically you don't dream (Ha...So stop thinking that you can control them or that I dont have abs, I showed you the photos didnt I??) but dreams do you... Yeah BABY!!!


But whatever be the case... They (or rather she) come(s).... Enter Fangman (No Fangwoman).....

I only dream in black and white...............

Hobbes said....

Eruption

Statutory Warning: Those with a weak heart, or any heart at all, the content in the post below is not meant for you. Others are welcome to read.

As I woke up in the middle of the night, around 5 a.m. with Eruption playing in my head, an idea popped in my head. The idea was to play and actually listen to Eruption in audio format. So following the idea I enqueued the song, the sole and only song to listen to it in repetition. Sleep was not coming. thats probably because I had already slept for like 8-9 hrs. With such a tired mind and Eruption in the background the following scenes passed before my eyes...



Eddie (not the Iron Maiden mascot, mind you.... but the fret-tapping maestro :-P) walkin in space with his guitar, making love to it. The guitar in turn moaned, gasped and cried-out... Eddie knows his moves...

Me looking at me... My eye sockets all hollow.. Then I have eyes... Now the eye balls are missing... Two planets involved in cosmic sex...

I am in a ship... Space-ship, mind it... Travelling faster than light... The space changing colors while I fizz past.... Planets changing color.... Planets stop to look at me.... The ones in cosmic sex...

A war scene... In a jungle... Lion feeding on one of the soldiers, its mouth painted with blood... BLOOD...BLOOD...

I am back in space... My ship is outta control...

A Samurai and a Ninja exchange blows through their swords... Faster than lightning... Shrink... Shrink...

My ship, about to crash...

My shoe laces are open...

I crash on a planet... I jump out of the ship... On my knees....

The alarm bell rings... Its morning....

Yo-Yo

"If you want to live under water, Michael, you must learn to breathe like a fish."

"How do you feel about that?"

"That we never had a choice. I don't feel good about it, but I won't feel bad. Its our natural destiny, as Teemer might say. Biologically, we are a new species and haven't learned to fit into nature yet. He thinks we are cancers."

The How to Kill Series : The First

Editor's Note: The blog from now on will be totally committed to describing ways to kill people and things. The owner of the blog is not directly responsible for his actions, he is an escapist and will relinquish any such allegations by a mere shrug.

The first section of this unending series is dedicated to the question : How to kill an optimist?

Before we travel deep into the fathomless sea of ways of killing an optimist, the question that should ring in your head, : Is it possible to kill an optimist?

The answer of course is NO. No you cannot kill an optimist. Some of you may say that I have lost my mind, and in due course present lethal ways of killing an optimist. Some of you who belong to the jovial category may try to gag and would suggest something like shooing a bunch of pessimists on our central theme. Ya sure, probably your jokes will have a better effect.

Tell an optimist that you can kill him. And he will give you a smile similar to a mothers who has just heard her baby’s first word. He will simply discard such a claim. He will simply tell you that he believes that he can survive. That he will still be alive. He would say that you can kill the body but not his never say die spirit. His body may not support his unquenchable spirit of optimism, but the fact is that at the end of the day the optimist still lives..

So what should we do now? Run out of business in our very first edition? Come on, don’t let the pessimist in you rise on such an optimistically correct situation. Throw all your worries on me, that’s why I am here for. I promised you a dead optimist and a dead one you shall get.

The trick is, tell the optimist that it is impossible to kill him. And he will simply chuckle and explain you in full theory how you seem to have confused impossible with difficult. He will tell you ways of killing him and will confess that he is dead too. So here you have it. The optimism is dead.

Next edition:: How to kill a How to kill something series.

Intezaar

itani baar samajhaayaa hai is dil ko..
ek baar aur sahii..
ab to use bhii..
agalii chot kaa hi intezaar rahataa hai..

One from "The Line"

There is this burning desire to do something now, I dunno what but something.. I want to run away, dunno where but have to run away.. Away from human influence.. Nobody around.. But I don't think I will last even there.. I would run away from there as well.. Its just this irresistible desire to run away.. To escape everything that is probably working in me.. I hate human faces.. No.. No I love them.. Its just that I need to change them after a while..

Remember a Day

Since I am actually going through the phase in which I do nothing and nothing at all, so I decided to ask myself this question, as to why I cannot stay in this phase forever. I know why I can't, I said. Now I wanted to know from others, about the same.. So with the help of Roger and Syd, I came up with these set of questions:

Q: Why can't we play today?
Why can't we stay that way?
Why can't we reach the sun?
Why can't we blow the years away?


And here are the answers from different living beings..

Slayer a.k.a. Dirty Chadha's response:

Dirty: Because we are all locked up in the prisons of our minds.
Me: And who will rescue us?
Dirty:Haven't you heard Steve Vai? This heart is a prison, bound by chains of gold. Wherein lies the key, god only knows.


Madman's response:

Because Pink Floyd said so. Also because we are all trapped.

Chadha's response:

Because we are engineers. Queen you shall be if you wish, just have to find your king..

TY's response:

Hey listen, I will call you up later, I have to rush to office.

Siddhartha's response:

Because we are humans

Game stopper's response:

Game stopper: U can if thats what u really want... Anythin u ask for is granted... If u jus want it enough.. the sky i'll wrap n put at your feet... do you want it?

Me: I will take my chances.. What should I be expecting?

Game stopper: Its not a chance.. its not a decision.. when u want it so much that u know u have to have it when theres no thinkin jus knowin its yours... when u love somethin beyond yourself.. unconditionally selflessly, when u want it so bad that it transcends the definition of want, nobody has the power to give it to u anymore..its yours by the simple fact that it exists... go take a look at that sky if u can feel it in u n u can feel ur life flowin through it then its not mine to give anymore.... its yours..

Baby Boomer

Baby Boomer: no answers
we could play today, if u wanted to..
we could stay that way, is our choice..
but all we do is blow years away..

Me: sun?

Baby Boomer: sun rulez, actually not as much as the moon..moon simply pwns


I am still awaiting responses from some candidates....will update it later...

Illusions of a realistic empty mind.......what???

Chewing up the nail, till there is none that can be bitten off. Gazing at the smoke from the still-burning....not totally crushed cigarette butt, the irresistible urge to have a sip, of tea and finish it all then and there. Listening to the "Call of the Ktulu", unsure of whether its playing in the head or on the player. Reading about Rajapaksa's crackdown on Tamils in Colombo, without discrimination. Thinking continuously, without fail to think of something. Checking up the mailbox for a new ray of mail. Bearing the disturbance of an irritating voice penetrating the sphere of the "Call of the Ktulu".

Checking the cell-phone, the killer of letters, for a text - message. Watching the pigeon outside my window, doing endless rounds. "Can I be of some help, you seem to be looking for something". Looking at the time at the system, "ah...the sun is shining beautifully". Looking at the cover of "Crime and Punishment", "yes honey i know, i owe you another 100 pages of reading". The source of the irritating voice seems to have been shooed away. "What?? its been just 30 minutes since the last cup of tea......"

Just another day at the office.....

Land, the ardent fool.

Hand in hand they ran over the fields
Land, the ardent fool,
Expects rain with just a cloud in the sky.
The day is bright and blue
The gold fields welcome them.

Land, the ardent fool,
Wishes to bloom flowers
“But you have gold”, said the sky
And thorns that prevail.
“I will write a song for you”, he told her.

The spring is where they will be
For its hot and there is no rain.
Land, the ardent fool,
Gives away all the water
Some to flowers other , to the sky

The wise ghost wished it was alive
Snow is on the land now
Land the ardent fool
Hopes foolishly, endlessly
Rain, rain, rain, it cries.

The Mind's Battle Victory and Me Gaining on the War

A hello - hi friend whose name isn't important: Aur bhai Mr. [my name here] kya haal chaal hain?

Me: Pata nahi

Thats when the cloud lifted yet another layer, and I "noticed" that I actually am the "Indecisive Bastard", as christened by MadMan..... Take this one up yours mind.

Death for Greatness

There may be either of the two things running through your head after you have read the title of this post and the content of the previous one. First(and the most common...haha read thy mind human), this guy has just lost it, he is on the verge of either a suicide or someone is going to kill him. Or(for the over smart ones) that the guy is obsessed with death, deadly obsessed.

Anywho, I neither deny nor accept both the schools of thoughts. But seriously my question is....Is greatness too big for life? Does it take a death to define the greatness. Can we spot greatness in its physical, materialistic form? Does death shoot up your greatness levels?

I know, I know, but naah..... I ain't in a hurry of being great....thanks for the option though.

Why don't you kill me??

Kill me, why don’t you kill me?? Am I not special enough to be killed, murdered. Killing is good and death is bad. The type of death I get will define what I had achieved in life. The worst form of death is the natural one. That means that you were not capable enough, even to find a way to die and nature or existence had to do the job for you. Still worse, of course, is the one by natural disasters/ man made disasters. It defines that nature thought of eliminating a whole bunch of nobody's and well I was one of them.

Suicide is of course far better than any of the above mentioned ways. At least I made sure that I cut nature’s work short and found a way of eliminating my own existence. Still a better category is that if I will be murdered. For I was important enough for someone or my death was, perhaps looked as a way for gaining profit and hence, before nature could get to me, they did. The best and probably the most high class (uptown) and satisfying death would then be assassination. Yes, doesn’t it feel great to hear it from someone that you were assassinated. A great feeling, isn’t it? Yes I would like to be assassinated and am sure most of you out there(whether you agree with me straight away or not) would love to be assassinated if given a choice.

The Deprived Generation..

What does one do with unused energy? A drive but none a driver in sight? They say ours is a deprived generation, with no great wars or no great depression to fight, no great cause or great leader follow. What does the youth of this generation do? The youth needs a direction to go... it needs to die..

Is it the fascination with death or the inability to accept that death is bad? In the absence of all the above mentioned great "causes" the youth's natural energy has gone disarray.. With no great hero to adopt a style or two from, the probability to fall for any mortal with a cap on was inevitable..



Long gone are the greater causes of serving ones mother/father land and lesser mortal of issues like, looking for real love, fighting for one's "space", to set the mind free, have taken center stage. No songs anymore make you realize the worthlessness of realizing, you have to realize it on your own. The "intellectual" ones seek refuge in songs of yesteryears the rest well they are uncharacteristically categorized as humans..No political issues get the same energy as it used to..Getting wasted is understood now..so getting wasted isn't hep as well.. Sex is just a compliment away..that too is no more of an accomplishment.. Money well...really you call that a cause??


No common cause for men/women to unite and fight for.. the deprived generation

Why Amitabh Bachchan is Amitabh Bachchan?

Something off the kinds of topics I usually write. But was sitting down the other day and was watching Kaala Pathar and came up with this thought.

So why is it that Amitabh Bachchan is Amitabh Bachchan? Acting is there but then I won't refer him to be the best actor that India has produced. There are a score of better actors, Om Puri, Nasiruddin Shah, to name a few. So it is not just the acting.

According to me Amitabh Bachchan is at such a position mainly because of the kinds of roles he played. He at the start of his carrer never played a "hero". He was played something related to it, but never the "Hero" itself. Mainly what he played at the beginning of his carrer was the role of an anti-Hero. The hero with negative shades or rather the hero with grey shades. While Indian cinema is all about a hero playing a completly idealist, Amitabh never played any such role, atleast early in his career.

Examples of the such kinds of roles are apt, Deewar, Don, Kaala Pathar, Laawaris etc. So the point is that he played roles that were more human. He potrayed that there is no such thing as idealism and that a hero is just another guy and that he too has his strengths and weaknesses. This is what the audience identified with and rose him to the level that he was.

Amitabh always had roles who were of a guy with high moral but was at times hard on luck or rather a guy who was forced to do wrong things because of the circumstances and he being human did it. This made the audience realise that things can go wrong and they are not completly bad or paapi if they do stuff to get on top. He potrayed roles which were more of idealism mixed with realism. A person true at heart but who may get beant due to circumstances.

All this packed with great punch lines made him a superstar. By the way the punch-lines also showed that his moral is high and even if he is down on luck he wouldnot take shit from anyone.

Another star that I think plays these kinds of roles aptly is Dev Anand. Whether its his role in R.K. Narayanan's The Guide or Kaalapaani etc. The only reason why he is not totally up there with Amitabh (although he is a total superstar in his on right and one of my favourites) is probably he(Amitabh) played the roles with greater energy and emotions.

Anyways this is all what I can think of right now.

Why am I an Atheist??

Worth reading::

Why am I an Atheist?

Child's Play

Last weekend my brother was here to stay over for a night as he moved back home for his college break. It was just great, it reminded me of the days we had when we were young and life was just too long. Although not very long back but I miss those days we spend at home together during the holidays, playing cricket in the midday hot sun, totally carefree and careless, the times we spent fighting.




When I sit alone in my room over the weekends and notice the street kids out there playing there hearts out, it reminds me of my days as a kid. The child out there playing in the sun doesnot bother about the heat nor does he/she worry about the boundaries. There are times when a car owner shouts and tries to scare away the kids. But the child was born free, born in a world where no boundaries should exist.

A child has a heart of pure gold and the heart is ever so enthusiastic and full of jows. Sorrow is unknown to it, for the mother is there to take care of everything.

Ah the good old days.....

How the mighty beat the law?

Today's newspaper contained an article as to how Shibu Soren, accused and currently sentenced for the murder of his secretary, is enjoying his life out of jail. The article talks as to how Shibu got himself transferred to the Raipur jail from the Tihar jail and is currently occupying a room ( two-rooms) at a Raipur hospital.

Well the paper just wrote about one of the many such cases. The well connected and the close ones of the ruling parties in India have made a joke of the Indian judicial system. And the judicial system acts too dumb or rather overloaded with work to notice any such indisperancies.

Not only is this evident the present case of Shibu Soren but also there is a similar pattern in all cases invoving high profile or well connected people. This pattern is not only ignored by the media but also by the people who have fought for the cause of getting the accused to the book.

The series goes on like this:
1. The accused is set free by a district court where the accused's case is handled for the first time. Mostly the reason given by these courts is lack of evidence or incomplete evidence. This happened in the case of Shibut Soren, Jessica Lal murder case, Priyadarshini Matoo case, the Pareira case etc.

2. Next the court is either brought to the High Court either by the victims of the case or the High Court intervenes on its own accord. Here the accussed is held guilty on all accounts and is sentenced accordingly. The same happened in all the cases mentione above.

3. The case is then moved by the accused to the Supreme Court where the court lets it hang on.

Now the catch is that the media is recording the case or giving it the top priority only thill the guilty is brought to the book. But moment this happens the media forgets about it. The accused and the well connected take advantage of this very fact and they quitely move the court to he Supreme Court. Once admitted by the Court there are several ways of getting out and staying free. One way is to get bail, another way is as our honurable politician did.

The ways of playing with the system are many. It is only us who keep a blind eye to it and don't try to find out whats happening behind the scenes.